In The Aftermath
by Mist.Filled.Eyes
Summary: Nothing could ever make this better, no jutsu, no healer, nothing could ever fix the wound that Shikamaru's devastating news had left. It felt his heart was about to come out of his chest. Dead, that one word was worse then anything he'd ever experienced.


His bag hit the wet ground with a little thump, it carried an awful lot of stuff for such a little bag though he supposed that the rain made it a bit heavier, and he dug around for a bandana to keep his hair back. He'd ran the last 8 miles back and his hair was falling into his face and driving him mental. He pulled his bag back onto his shoulder and tied the red cloth around his forehead as he walked into the borders of the city. He saluted a couple of ANBU on his way past and frowned when they only looked away.

For crying out loud, what had he done wrong now? He sighed and snapped his fingers to send his bag on ahead to the apartment he shared with his lover. If he was already on people's shit-list then he didn't need to look like he was some random traveler, may as well look he was an actual citizen of Suna.

He slid down one of his typical shortcuts and his frown deepened drastically when he walked onto the busiest street in Suna to find the whole place shrouded in black.

Every person, shinobi and villager alike, were dressed in black. It was like a goddam shadow had hugged everyone.

Everybody stopped moving as he walked onto the street, people took in his white shirt and typical black pants. One girl walked up to him and asked quietly, "Sasuke Uchiha?" He nodded and didn't react when she took his hand in hers and began walking down the center of the streets. "There's something you need to see."

Now he spoke up, people were reaching out and gripping his arms, rubbing his back and shoulders and murmuring their condolences. Saying they shared his grief. Grief? What grief, there was no grief to be shared!

"What are you talking about, what happened?" The girl tightened her grip a bit and pulled him along faster. When they reached the city square, just out front of Gaara's office building, she let him go. "Someone tell me what the hell is going on! 'I share your grief'? I have no grief. I just got home, what could possibly have happened that I wasn't notified about?"

Nobody said anything at first, then Kankuro came up from the crowd, and Temari joined him. Both their faces were tear-stained and Temari's hands were shaking so badly that Shikamaru came forward from behind him, took her hands a moment then passed her to Kankuro when she started sobbing. The Nara levelled a sober look at him and came closer.

"Sit down Sasuke, you don't want to be standing right now." He tried to guide the last Uchiha to sit down but Sasuke wouldn't be deterred. He shook off the gentle hands and yelled.

"Answer me Shikamaru. What happened?" Sasuke felt his heart rate speeding up, everyone was in mourning. Not many people could warrant a country wide mourning, little to nothing could make Temari and Kankuro weep so badly they could speak. Even Shikamaru's dark eyes glistened when he confirmed Sasuke's worst fear.

"While you were away...G-Gaara, he-"

"No, no, no. Stop it! If this is a joke, then it's a fucking cruel one." Sasuke grabbed the man by the shirt. "Don't lie to me." He let go abruptly and looked out on the crowd, everyone was crying and murmuring prayers. He shook his head, all of sudden feeling like there wasn't enough air in the world. One woman started sobbing suddenly at the look on his face.

"Gaara died two nights ago, he was murdered at home."

"_No!"_ He screamed it and then felt the air rush from his lungs as he almost collapsed. Shika grabbed him, holding him on his feet. "Oh god!" He screamed then, unable to find the words. He just started screaming out his pain. Temari appeared beside him and offered her arms. Shika passed him off and Temari let them both fall to the ground.

The world was ending, it had to be, his lungs and throat ached from his screams of agony. Temari's tears were hot on his neck from where she'd buried her face. Kankuro joined them, gripped their shoulders and held on tight. The very sun above them was darkened as the rain poured down and the Land of Wind was covered in a layer of darkness.

"Sasuke, it's okay," a voice murmured. "Sasuke come back to me, please." He shook his head and cried out again, feeling the moisture of tears on his own cheeks now. Nothing would ever stop this, nothing could ever fix what was shattered by Shikamaru's unfortunate news.

"Sasuke!"

And his eyes flew open. Panic sweeped through him as he took in the darkened bedroom, the soft sheets around him, and the smell of the desert at night. Fresh tears spilled down his face, Gaara smelled like the desert, always did. Then he realized where he was, recognized that he was in bed not the square. The Kazekage himself appeared in his vision.

"Sasuke, you're home. It was just a dream, jesus you almost gave me a heart attack." Sasuke tackled him, sending them both sprawling off the side of the bed. Gaara turned them so he landed on the ground, letting out a quiet oomph at the sudden meeting of back and ground. "What's the matter? You just started screaming and crying and you wouldn't wake up."

Sasuke ignored the question entirely, very silently hating himself for being so weak as to cry out in his _sleep_, and gripped Gaara tight enough to hurt. Gaara's breath left him in a rush and he hugged the raven loosely. "Are you going to answer me anytime?" Sasuke shook his head.

"Not quite yet." That pain stuck with him, if someone ever told him that Gaara died he wondered how long he would survive. Either he'd get killed by an enemy kept at bay by Gaara's protection - or worse, that pain in his heart would kill him. It had felt like he was dying, surely such brutal torment would finish him.

Sasuke shook his head slightly, stop it stop it stop it! Stop panicking, stop crying, stop everything. Take a deep breath and remember that the man you are crying over is here. Sasuke slowed his thoughts and took that deep breath, felt the light grasp of Gaara's arms and noticed the rise and fall of his chest. Gaara was here and alive. No need to panic.

"I had a nightmare," Gaara's mouth opened briefly but thought better of it Sasuke didn't do heartfelt often and when he did it was best not to interrupt him, "I dreamt that you died. You were ki-killed while I was away and when I came back I got the notification from Shikamaru. Temari was so distraught she couldn't speak and-" From the vicinity of his collar bone Gaara heard a muffled sob.

Gaara didn't let him get further, just lifted one hand from his waist and tilted the Uchiha's head to kiss him gently. "I am alive. I am right here." He took Sasuke's hand and pressed it to his chest. "Feel that? My heart is still beating and will be until I retire. Probably when I'm about 80." He pressed their foreheads together. "I'm not going anywhere. Don't even think about doubting that. Death itself can't keep me from you."

Sasuke nodded mutely. Damn him, that was exactly the right thing to say. Gaara lifted himself up onto his elbows and kissed him again. "I'm grateful though, that you'd mourn if I died."

Sasuke managed a laugh. "You thought I wouldn't?"

"I did wonder," Gaara shrugged meaninglessly. Sasuke got to his feet and offered a hand, laughing softly at how utterly undignified Gaara looked. Once they were both back on the bed Gaara sighed. "I've gotta call my sister."

Sasuke raised one dark eyebrow.

"She was coming over, but we walked in and you were having a nightmare and I know you hate it when people see you having nightmares. That's why you always look so exhausted after missions, you never get a wink of sleep." As Gaara spoke he pulled his tie out of his vest and opened the dark fabric. "I'll make tea while I'm up Green right?"

Sasuke nodded quietly. Gaara pulled his vest off and tossed it carelessly over a chair as he walked out of the room. He didn't know Gaara had known all that. Not that it wasn't true, but he thought Gaara attributed his exhaustion to the typical mission fatigue. He even knew the right type of tea to make.

For a moment Sasuke allowed himself to be startled and ridiculously pleased that Gaara knew that.

When the red head came back he was on the phone, without breaking his thought he passed the tea over. Sasuke sipped it gratefully as he smiled much to happily. 2 sugars, nothing else. Just the way he loved it. Gaara undid his tie and it joined his vest. "Well that's a mood change, he's smiling now. I must've done something right." Gaara smiled at him as he addressed his sister.

Sasuke put his tea down and put Gaara's with his before shifting to straddle the Kage's hips. He leaned to murmur into Gaara's ear. "You know you're amazing, ne?"

Gaara blinked. Then grinned and laughed. "I'm Kazekage, of course I'm amazing." They laughed and Temari inserted some comment to keep her brother in stitches. Sasuke moved back to his side of the bed. Gaara slipped one arm around his waist and Sasuke curled up against him.

Oh yes, if Gaara ever died it would finish him, but right now they were together.


End file.
